The World According to... Boring John

IDEAS

Well, if I insist on writing 1000 words a time then this blog-thing is just not going to take off. Is it? So let's make a deal- bear with me, reader, as my alter-egoes have a little chin-wag- as long as you write 1000 words per week, proofed a lot better than the last entry you made, then we're all happy?

Deal?

Deal.

(Have you ever listened to a person talking to himself? Is it a case of two voices, as above, or just a monologue? Or do you prefer to hurry on past the 'madman'?)

Anyway, this entry - which I will update as and when - is goingto contain my 'writing ideas'. Hopefully, as I 'flesh out' some of those ideas into individual blog entries, I shall link to those entries from this page. Marvellous.

So what are my 'ideas'?

(Just wait a minute while I turn the radio over. Westwood s*cks! Too much s*earing, and unnecessary bl**pers, and far far too much - yee-hay mallarkey! Pete Tong, on the other hand... Pete knows a good tooon, but does not know a good website designer! Ha. So, Friday night at 21.12 - for that is the time - let me switch over to the inspiring sounds of Classic FM.)

Okay, back to the ideas...

Idea 1: Commitment

I recently read Mike Gayle's novel Mr Commitment (for research purposes, I hasten to add), to see what a successful novellist made of the issue of commitment. Answer: not a great deal. (But the novel is very readable!)

Commitment is about choosing one over all others, I agree, but it's so much more than that too. I've come to think of commitment as being one of the learning points of life - without commitment, life is less. Erm, this is difficult to explain. (Clearly!)

My writing notes don't really help, either:

What is commitment?

Boy meets girl / gets cold feet / they split / he sees error of his ways / boy gets girl / boy marries girl [Maybe boy becomes man?]

Or, more fundamental than this...

Boy meets girl after girl after girl but something seems to stop him finding the "right" girl.
Why?

Interestingly, at least to me, both those themes feature in Mike Gayles first 2 novels, Mr Commitment and My Legendary Girlfriend, respectively.

Maybe Mike knows more than I give him credit for. (The urge to write a smiley face following that last sentence was only just resisted, and this sentence put in its place! Okay?)

Idea 2: 3

3 relates to three years, and is the exact period of time I have separated from a particular girlfriend. (Why did we split up?Well, I'll save that for another idea.)

So what have I learnt about myself, and relationships, in those three years.

The idea is to illuminate 'what I learnt' (or not) via the various relationships I had in those three years.

Some example lessons:

* Don't care about what people think about you - Thanks to T

* Whatever you do, and however hard you try to understand and to be understood, you may still fail and people will still not like you - Thanks to M, N and me

* Neediness is plain un-sexy (so is flakiness, but less so) - M, L, and me

* An amazing sex life is not everything, whether we're talking about technique, confidence, sexual appetite or even how sexy a body is - M, N, A, L, T etc.

* Sometimes when you look for 'signs' to what direction you should take, who you should be with etc., well sometimes you see whatever you want to see. Signs only become obvious after the event, perhaps - Me

* Maybe the choice of nobody rather A, B or C was the best choice - Me

* Want to get back with someone? Don't just think about the sexy moments or how much you get on, but equally don't just think of the decidely un-sexy moments, either! - Me

* Life is short, enjoy every moment

I'm still learning if the truth be told. (Can you tell?)

It doesn't help that people spout on about their own success, when they sometimes a) don't know why they're successful or b) are mistaken about their success.

This has happened.

And I've listened. Mistake.

There are many people in successful relationships that understand how their relationship works, repeat: how their relationships work. These people should speak out, not as gurus but as guides, and see "This worked for me, it might work for you". But please, no preaching, no "I'm thin, why aren't you?" because it helps no-one!

Idea 3: Love and Simpleology

Simpleology, Mark Joyner's 'science of getting what you want', is a way of setting goals in your life and actually achieving them. Sounds dull, but isn't.

A goal could be to make more money, be famous, learn how to speak Spanish (ahem!) or even...

1. Write Your Major Target Here
Something you want to achieve in the next 6 months to 3 years. It should be bold, inspiring, and *very specific*

Commit myself to a long-term relationship, with a view to starting a family

2. Can You Define This More Clearly?
Remember the law of clear vision. Give specific numbers or results. Something that is verifiable and attainable

3. How Important Is It That You Hit This Target?
How will it make you feel when you hit it? What benefit will it give you? What will happen if you don't? What will you become when you do? Get specific and emotional.

[... ]

The idea behind Simpleology is that you must charge your goals with emotion, and remind yourself of those goals (and that emotion) every day. And every day you set daily targets that take you one step nearer to hitting your target.

And my idea was to write about 'love' in this context, as a life objective and measure that success. (After all, whether spoken of or written down on a piece of paper, being in a loving and long-term relationship is probably the goal of everyone!)

--

Okay, there I must end these (somewhat personal) musings.

It's 10.18 in the AM, on the eve of 2006. And I have places to goto, see!

Adios amigos