And that's how two characters should dance together in life?
Yes, and it's all explained here in this (almost finished*) version of The World According to Boring John (PDF version) - you'll need a password!**
Enjoy! I know I didn't.
* This book may never get finished - He may not be up to it!
** And the password is... - contact me (or Him) for it!
Showing posts with label Procrastination. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Procrastination. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Monday, April 16, 2007
Who Said This?
"I cannot be happy whilst you, someone I care about, are not. I am not responsible for your happiness but it does not seem fair for me to find peace when your life is still shadowed in pain?"
Whoever said it, and I have a strong idea which Idiot it was, they are destined to live a life of struggle, for sure.
"It wasn't your fault," said the adult to the little boy in the photo. "It wasn't your fault."
Wipe the tear from your eye, Mr Idiot. It was not Your fault.
Whoever said it, and I have a strong idea which Idiot it was, they are destined to live a life of struggle, for sure.
"It wasn't your fault," said the adult to the little boy in the photo. "It wasn't your fault."
Wipe the tear from your eye, Mr Idiot. It was not Your fault.
Monday, March 12, 2007
Three Characters Walk Into A Pub...
1) These three characters walk into a pub: The Reader, The Writer and The Leading Man. They make their way to the bar. There, they start to eye each other up, each expecting the other to perform, to do something, to 'dance, monkey, dance!'. But the sign on the wall clearly states: No Dancing!.
2) So they all turn around and leave.
3) No this is not a joke (I don't believe in jokes, remember!), this is based on a true story. Cos all stories are true, right, whether fictional or non-fictional. If someone imagines it, it must be true.
4) Anyway, These Three Characters? They're just outside, waiting: waiting for directions; waiting for a new page, for the status quo to be broken, for someone to blink!
5) (Blinkin' ell!)
PS Yes today is the day that The Writer copies entries from this blog to put into the book. He's feeling rather pleased with himself, actually, because He's come up with a clever way to reuse much of what he has written over the years -- poems, journals, blogs, even the precious piece called Blocked that he wrote at Arvon, during October 2006 -- into his book. I guess his internet marketing training is paying off for him at last.
2) So they all turn around and leave.
3) No this is not a joke (I don't believe in jokes, remember!), this is based on a true story. Cos all stories are true, right, whether fictional or non-fictional. If someone imagines it, it must be true.
4) Anyway, These Three Characters? They're just outside, waiting: waiting for directions; waiting for a new page, for the status quo to be broken, for someone to blink!
5) (Blinkin' ell!)
PS Yes today is the day that The Writer copies entries from this blog to put into the book. He's feeling rather pleased with himself, actually, because He's come up with a clever way to reuse much of what he has written over the years -- poems, journals, blogs, even the precious piece called Blocked that he wrote at Arvon, during October 2006 -- into his book. I guess his internet marketing training is paying off for him at last.
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Boring John's World Looks Like This...
The world according to Boring John a la March 2007.
Well it looks a lot like the list below(*).
About ME (8)
BJ Thoughts (113)
BLOGS (20)
Communication (25)
Dreams (6)
Fear (13)
Jokes (1)
Life (39)
People (38)
Poetry (6)
Problems (32)
Procrastination (20)
Relationships (53)
Religion (1)
Sex (25)
Tosh (96)
What Do I Know? (77)
Wisdom (41)
Words (6)
These are the subjects that are interesting me, obviously.
Who'd have thought that Sex would only score a 25, especially when Relationships has the third highest score (number of postings) of 53. Come to think of it, perhaps a ratio of 1 to 2, sex to relationships, aint that bad. (I know lots of 'real' people (including some women) who would die for such portions! Yes, die!)
Clearly, I think too much in the virtual world. There's a surprise!
I do not think that much about religion (though that first post is a particularly fine one, even if I do say so myself), nor do I care for jokes.
I'm into wisdom and words and ME.
Google isn't into me, though. I don't even appear first in the listings for Boring John. I mean that's my name, Google, ferchrissakes! John Boring clearly is NOT Boring John. (And why am I only being found for stoopid terms like protectmyidentity.co.uk ? I need to get famous, and fast!)
But, what do I know? I know a lot about Tosh! ;-)
(And if you like my tosh then do subscribe to my blog whydontya. It's easy. You'll find a link to click below the pic of the little boy in the sailor's uniform. Any monkey can do it! [Erm, I think you'll find that that sailors uniform is the closest thing that kid, the Pele of his generation, had to a football shirt - Ed, aka The Writer.]
* Yes, this is yet another example of this character living out his life here, in this blog, when he should be making paper pages quiver with his wit and disdain for life.
What's wrong with little Johnny! Why won't he come out to play? (You're right, replied The Writer, let's add this post to the Procrastination label too and then get bouncing on the blue ball!)
Well it looks a lot like the list below(*).
About ME (8)
BJ Thoughts (113)
BLOGS (20)
Communication (25)
Dreams (6)
Fear (13)
Jokes (1)
Life (39)
People (38)
Poetry (6)
Problems (32)
Procrastination (20)
Relationships (53)
Religion (1)
Sex (25)
Tosh (96)
What Do I Know? (77)
Wisdom (41)
Words (6)
These are the subjects that are interesting me, obviously.
Who'd have thought that Sex would only score a 25, especially when Relationships has the third highest score (number of postings) of 53. Come to think of it, perhaps a ratio of 1 to 2, sex to relationships, aint that bad. (I know lots of 'real' people (including some women) who would die for such portions! Yes, die!)
Clearly, I think too much in the virtual world. There's a surprise!
I do not think that much about religion (though that first post is a particularly fine one, even if I do say so myself), nor do I care for jokes.
I'm into wisdom and words and ME.
Google isn't into me, though. I don't even appear first in the listings for Boring John. I mean that's my name, Google, ferchrissakes! John Boring clearly is NOT Boring John. (And why am I only being found for stoopid terms like protectmyidentity.co.uk ? I need to get famous, and fast!)
But, what do I know? I know a lot about Tosh! ;-)
(And if you like my tosh then do subscribe to my blog whydontya. It's easy. You'll find a link to click below the pic of the little boy in the sailor's uniform. Any monkey can do it! [Erm, I think you'll find that that sailors uniform is the closest thing that kid, the Pele of his generation, had to a football shirt - Ed, aka The Writer.]
* Yes, this is yet another example of this character living out his life here, in this blog, when he should be making paper pages quiver with his wit and disdain for life.
What's wrong with little Johnny! Why won't he come out to play? (You're right, replied The Writer, let's add this post to the Procrastination label too and then get bouncing on the blue ball!)
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
10 Things I Am Going To Do In 2007
In no particular order:
Well, there's more.
The above begins on Jan 1st 2007 and ends when I've completed it or when I have more important things to do.
So there.
- Write a novel
- Get my hair cut. (I haven't cut my hair in over three years, don't you know, so I'm due!)
- Change. Change what? Change (or at least begin to change) everything that needs to change and challenge the behaviour in myself that I don't like
- Eat frogs, everyday!
- Visit as many of my friends as I can whether they live locally or they live darn sarf!
- Hang out with my family more
- Run 10K in under 40 minutes
- Do things I don't like doing; e.g. talk when I want to be quiet, go out when I want to stay in, smile or laugh when I want to snarl or loathe. I want to start doing things I don't like doing so that I start liking doing them. (Got that?)
- Stop flirting, start talking; stop leering, start listening; stop wondering, start learning
- And, finally, love my leetle self a leetle bit more (ahhhh!)
Well, there's more.
The above begins on Jan 1st 2007 and ends when I've completed it or when I have more important things to do.
So there.
Friday, December 01, 2006
Eating the monkey!
Actually that should be eating the frog!
(Eating the monkey is an altogether different experience, not without its own benefits.)
Basically, eating the frog is about doing the stuff you don't like and doing it first rather than last. Doing it first means it doesn't get to cast a murky shadow over the rest of the day as you worry about doing it later. Doing it first means it's done and you can now get onto doing the nice stuff, energised even, in some cases!)
Come to think of it, maybe eating the monkey is not that different to eating the frog. Eh, ladies? ;-)
Anyway, today I'm going to start eating the frog each and every day! Yum, yum in my tum!
(Eating the monkey is an altogether different experience, not without its own benefits.)
Basically, eating the frog is about doing the stuff you don't like and doing it first rather than last. Doing it first means it doesn't get to cast a murky shadow over the rest of the day as you worry about doing it later. Doing it first means it's done and you can now get onto doing the nice stuff, energised even, in some cases!)
Come to think of it, maybe eating the monkey is not that different to eating the frog. Eh, ladies? ;-)
Anyway, today I'm going to start eating the frog each and every day! Yum, yum in my tum!
Friday, June 30, 2006
I don't like doing stuff I don't like!
I guess that's just my excuse for putting things off, for procrastinating.
Well can I tell you that I didn't like 'not procrastinating', not at all. It interfered with my days, interrupted my social life and was occasionally bloody annoying.
Anyway, with the help of a friend, I got the following done:
21. Put my "Storth Avenue" sign on my bedroom wall. (Yes, it might look silly to you -- should you ever get to see the inside of my bedroom!! -- but not to me!)
22. I made an appointment with the sports injury clinic. (My right knee hurts, my right calf gets sore, my left calf too. Anyone would think that I was gettin' on a bit!)
23. Put curtain blinds in bathroom. (You could easily see in from outside. It were embarrassing it was!)
24. Buy a new vacuum cleaner. (The old vac. really had sucked it's last bit of dust.)
25. Buy off-road running shoes
26. Buy running shorts. (Previously, I either ran in track-suit bottoms, Gunner Sugdens, or shorts so skimpy even the ex- blushed!)
27. Put two mirrors on the walls upstairs
28. Refitted the door to the store room, off the kitchen. (It now opens without scraping the floor!)
And, I don't care if you think if you think these are tenuous tasks, I started reading my gardening book (thanks, Alan Titchmarsh) and I have been exercising every other day.
29. and 30.
There. Done. Phew!
(We'll ignore the fact that I repeated one of the tasks! Spot it?)
I promise to try and not let things stack up, quite as much in the future. If only to avoid another month like June!
Well can I tell you that I didn't like 'not procrastinating', not at all. It interfered with my days, interrupted my social life and was occasionally bloody annoying.
Anyway, with the help of a friend, I got the following done:
21. Put my "Storth Avenue" sign on my bedroom wall. (Yes, it might look silly to you -- should you ever get to see the inside of my bedroom!! -- but not to me!)
22. I made an appointment with the sports injury clinic. (My right knee hurts, my right calf gets sore, my left calf too. Anyone would think that I was gettin' on a bit!)
23. Put curtain blinds in bathroom. (You could easily see in from outside. It were embarrassing it was!)
24. Buy a new vacuum cleaner. (The old vac. really had sucked it's last bit of dust.)
25. Buy off-road running shoes
26. Buy running shorts. (Previously, I either ran in track-suit bottoms, Gunner Sugdens, or shorts so skimpy even the ex- blushed!)
27. Put two mirrors on the walls upstairs
28. Refitted the door to the store room, off the kitchen. (It now opens without scraping the floor!)
And, I don't care if you think if you think these are tenuous tasks, I started reading my gardening book (thanks, Alan Titchmarsh) and I have been exercising every other day.
29. and 30.
There. Done. Phew!
(We'll ignore the fact that I repeated one of the tasks! Spot it?)
I promise to try and not let things stack up, quite as much in the future. If only to avoid another month like June!
Monday, June 19, 2006
17, 18, 19, 20
Don't you think it's funny looking at the types of things that people a) think they have to do and b) think they have to do but don't do.
For me, these things include:
17. Buying slippers for my house visitors (I'm somewhat precious about not getting mud on my carpet)
18. Buying a copy of Readers Digest (This was a recommend read, actually, from one of my writing courses.)
19. Buying a mobile phone (My old phone is costing my £15 per month, and the battery's dying, so I might as well buy a new one)
20. Installing a surround sound system for my TV (Has taken me several hours already, and still I don't know how to do everything I want)
Anyway, there are less than two weeks to go until I can return to putting things off again!
For me, these things include:
17. Buying slippers for my house visitors (I'm somewhat precious about not getting mud on my carpet)
18. Buying a copy of Readers Digest (This was a recommend read, actually, from one of my writing courses.)
19. Buying a mobile phone (My old phone is costing my £15 per month, and the battery's dying, so I might as well buy a new one)
20. Installing a surround sound system for my TV (Has taken me several hours already, and still I don't know how to do everything I want)
Anyway, there are less than two weeks to go until I can return to putting things off again!
Friday, June 16, 2006
16. The things is...
if the things we put off doing were interesting, and didn't take long, we wouldn't put them off would we!
16. Bought business cards. Well, actually one of those rubber stamps with my address on it
16. Bought business cards. Well, actually one of those rubber stamps with my address on it
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
14, 15 etc.
I'm still doing more than one thing* per day, one day in advance, but that's fine by me!
So:
14. I unpackaged a free gift, sent to me by a company called Digital River. Why they sent me a remote control toy car, I don't know, but my nephew has already had a good giggle over it!
15. Bought a new mobile phone. I get a brand new phone for £15 per month, which is equivalent to what I'm spendin on my own, somewhat faulty, Motoral V500. (I got 2 of these, and they both ended up having faults! Grrr.)
* Things are those tasks that I have successfully put off for more than a month
So:
14. I unpackaged a free gift, sent to me by a company called Digital River. Why they sent me a remote control toy car, I don't know, but my nephew has already had a good giggle over it!
15. Bought a new mobile phone. I get a brand new phone for £15 per month, which is equivalent to what I'm spendin on my own, somewhat faulty, Motoral V500. (I got 2 of these, and they both ended up having faults! Grrr.)
* Things are those tasks that I have successfully put off for more than a month
Monday, June 12, 2006
9, 10, 11, 12, 13...
It's getting more and more difficult to un-procrastinate each and every day. So I played catch-up over the weekend and did all of the following on one day, or another:
09. Spent my HMV voucher on a Giles Peterson compilation of African music
10. Spent the final £10 of my M&S vouchers on a toaster
11. Put my £5 Argos voucher towards a £20 shower curtain
12. Pumped the tyres up on my bike
13. Mowed the lawn on my gardens using the right tools (i.e. a lawnmower that actually has a blade) - got help from a friend to do this one, though
(Oh, what will I do with my day off tomorrow!)
09. Spent my HMV voucher on a Giles Peterson compilation of African music
10. Spent the final £10 of my M&S vouchers on a toaster
11. Put my £5 Argos voucher towards a £20 shower curtain
12. Pumped the tyres up on my bike
13. Mowed the lawn on my gardens using the right tools (i.e. a lawnmower that actually has a blade) - got help from a friend to do this one, though
(Oh, what will I do with my day off tomorrow!)
Friday, June 09, 2006
08. I don't care what you say...
I needed to run a credit check, courtesy of www.protectmyidentity.co.uk , and so I did (on the 8th of June, too!).
Well I've paid for identity theft insurance, I might as well use it!
(On a side note, doing something I've been putting off each day is proving more difficult than I first imagined, and I'm starting to regret setting myself the challenge. I mean, it's starting to interfere with my social life!)
Well I've paid for identity theft insurance, I might as well use it!
(On a side note, doing something I've been putting off each day is proving more difficult than I first imagined, and I'm starting to regret setting myself the challenge. I mean, it's starting to interfere with my social life!)
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
07. Feed The Birds
No, not feed the world, I'll leave that to others. I just want to feed the birds, and so I bought a hardy-looking (but plastic) peanut bird-feeder, today, and loaded it with nuts. Now if only the pigeons would shoo away, so that those darlin' lil Blue Tits would come out to play!
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
06. Tenuous Tools
It's a poor workman that blames his tools, or so they say!
I will now be able to blame my tools, as I've just bought lots of them for the very first time. (Hello Mr Screw Driver! How ya doin?)
I've been putting off buying from www.whdirect.co.uk for a while now.
It counts
I will now be able to blame my tools, as I've just bought lots of them for the very first time. (Hello Mr Screw Driver! How ya doin?)
I've been putting off buying from www.whdirect.co.uk for a while now.
It counts
Monday, June 05, 2006
Not procrastinating is like washing up!
Just as soon as you've finished a task (finished not procrastinating), then another task (sometimes several) takes its place.
05. Tenuous, but...
I don't care!
Putting my insurance details in my wallet and the phone no. in my car means that if I break down someone gallant and shiny will come to my rescue. (Because not only do I not have green fingers, I don't have oily fingers either!) But if someone steals my car, they won't also steal my personal information!
So I don't care what you say, it counts. (Ner!)
Putting my insurance details in my wallet and the phone no. in my car means that if I break down someone gallant and shiny will come to my rescue. (Because not only do I not have green fingers, I don't have oily fingers either!) But if someone steals my car, they won't also steal my personal information!
So I don't care what you say, it counts. (Ner!)
Sunday, June 04, 2006
04. The Application
Despite doing loads and loads of 'stuff' today, very little of it was stuff I had been putting off for weeks and weeks. (What a surprise!) So that is why today's entry is the somewhat feeble application to rent the garden land at the rear of my house. Applied for, and posted, only six months after I moved in!
Now, whilst you're here, why don't I tell you about all the stuff I got done today...
Now, whilst you're here, why don't I tell you about all the stuff I got done today...
Saturday, June 03, 2006
03. Don't laugh but...
I bought a new toothbrush today (a two-pack).
No, I hadn't been using my last brush for decades, and so no it wasn't manky and festering. I'd just been using the last one for more than six months and I needed a new one.
Simple as that.
So, as the policeman often says, "Run along. There's nothing to see here!"
No, I hadn't been using my last brush for decades, and so no it wasn't manky and festering. I'd just been using the last one for more than six months and I needed a new one.
Simple as that.
So, as the policeman often says, "Run along. There's nothing to see here!"
Friday, June 02, 2006
02. Will signed
I've been putting off getting my will signed for over 18 months and now, tada!, I've signed it and had it witnessed.
Now all I need to do is a) win the lottery and b) pop my clogs and it will have all been worthwhile. (Won't it?)
Now all I need to do is a) win the lottery and b) pop my clogs and it will have all been worthwhile. (Won't it?)
Thursday, June 01, 2006
01. Change Of Address
The first day of June and, as promised, by very first un-procrastination (for want of a better expression), namely:
01. Complete my change of address
After several months of changing my address, before during and after my move to my new sunny home, I had just 4 companies to contact.
Yes, it's true that the ex-owner of my home has a much simpler change-of-address strategy; i.e. none. Instead, she simply tells me (eventually) to 'just ignore it, it's rubbish'. Okay, you know best, I think to myself, I'm sure the tax-man will find your new address, sooner or later! Hee hee!
Anyway, it really doesn't matter if I should or shouldn't un-procrastinate: I've been meaning to do it for a while, and now it's done!
So, until tomorrow, when I may well climb Mount Everest, talk to the trees, or even buy myself a new toothbrush (I kid you not!)
Adios.
01. Complete my change of address
After several months of changing my address, before during and after my move to my new sunny home, I had just 4 companies to contact.
- The obligatory junkmail; Italian wine from an Italian wine company I've never heard of (guess they must have 'purchased' my details from a wine company I have heard of!)
- The inevitable follow-up mail from a not-so dirty weekend in Bristol -- hello Missus! -- courtesy of Superbreak.com
- Save the Children? I only wanted to do my (modest) bit. But still the begging letters come... :-(
- Amnesty International needs no introduction. You know what! They run a very efficient change of address service, for sure!
Yes, it's true that the ex-owner of my home has a much simpler change-of-address strategy; i.e. none. Instead, she simply tells me (eventually) to 'just ignore it, it's rubbish'. Okay, you know best, I think to myself, I'm sure the tax-man will find your new address, sooner or later! Hee hee!
Anyway, it really doesn't matter if I should or shouldn't un-procrastinate: I've been meaning to do it for a while, and now it's done!
So, until tomorrow, when I may well climb Mount Everest, talk to the trees, or even buy myself a new toothbrush (I kid you not!)
Adios.
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